lovelylisab

Since I’m not going to worry about the total amount of weight I have to lose and focus on small, attainable little goals. I’m going to have to reward myself to make this fun.  Since I never buy myself anything that is not nessecary, this, I feel, may be my most brilliant idea yet

So,  I’m eyeing this cool little gadget for when I hit my 10%.  I’ll get it in pink, of course. I rarely use my cell phone for talking on the phone. Instead, I use it to text, check my email, and google search stuff I need to know right away. Why would I use my phone to talk? That’s crazy.

And maybe for my first 10lbs, I’ll buy myself some ballet slippers. I just got the NYC ballet dvd and let me tell you, I feel like a freakin ballerina.  Not because I’m especially a good dancer or even graceful by any means, but it was so fun! Brought me back to my days as a child of dance class and tutus.

Except much harder.

There’s this one part, where you lay on your stomach and arch your back up so you are supposed to make this beautiful arch and you squeeze your shoulders together to work your shoulders. Ha!  My back does not bend that way, thank you very much.  I was able to get far enough off the floor so I wouldn’t get rug burn on my nose when I tilted my head towards the dvd. The lady on the dvd had arched herself so everything above her belly button was off the floor.

  I had to pause the dvd so I could have a good 5 minutes of laughter.

It’s hard to look at how much weight I have to lose and not be discouraged. I always get overwhelmed by looking at the big goal number, and trying to figure out how long I have to do this.

I know I just started-this time- but it’s not like it’s the first time I’ve started.  And I look at the number and I’m like damn- that’s a LOT of weight to lose.  Then I wonder if I can do it. I know I want to. I know I need to, if I want to live the life I want. But, stick-to-it-ness isn’t really part of my vocabulary. I’m really one of those people who run at something full steam…then I run out of steam and I’m on to something else.

I wonder if I should stop looking at the amount I have to lose, and just break it up into small parts. I can lose 10lbs… maybe I should just focus on that?